Relationships are never easy to maintain. In fact, it takes a lot of effort and focus from both parties involved to achieve a healthy relationship that lasts. To create and maintain a great relationship with your life partner, you need to follow these habits.
7) Start doing the things you used to do while you were dating.
As the years come and go, we tend to get lazy when it comes to our relationship. As a result, we lose our gentleness, understanding and patience that we used to show our partner during the first stages of our relationship. Try to remember all the things that you used to do for your partner while you were in your first year of relationship with him or her.
6) Communicate what you want.
Over the passage of time, we make the wrong assumption that our partners know us inside out that we don’t need to communicate what we want or need. This is so dangerous as what this does is raise expectations that get deflated just as quickly. As a result, these unmet expectations makes us question the connection we have with our partners as well as the viability of our partnership.
5) Know your partner really well.
Figure out what your partner is really all about by asking him or her questions on a more personal level. Find out what excites him or her physically, mentally and emotionally. Oftentimes, we get consumed with what we think our partner wants as opposed to truly being in tune with our partners by knowing what he or she really needs to thrive. Just because it doesn’t make sense to you doesn’t mean that’s it’s not real for him or her. If it’s that important to them then you just have to do it.
4) Stop asking “how was your day?”
Asking this boring question will only yield a boring answer. Not only does it do nothing to improve your connection with your partner, it also hurts your relationship as it makes you lose the opportunity to connect with your partner in small ways.
Instead, ask your partner what made him or her smile today or which part of the day is most challenging to him or her. By doing this, not only will you be pleasantly surprised with the answers you’ll get, you’ll also gain valuable insight into how he or she thinks.
3) Have a ritual every week where you touch base with each other.
Set aside some time each week where you check in with each other about how things went the previous week. If something went wrong, come up together with ways to improve things the following week. You can also use this time to talk about your schedules for the coming week and what you would like to see happen in your relationship in the coming days. By having this kind of ritual, you’ll be able to avoid unspoken, unmet needs as well as built-up resentment.
2) Keep things sexy.
Can you imagine the change in your relationship if you and your partner agree to adhere to behaviors which you find sexy and avoid those that you deem unsexy? And we’re not just talking about the kind of sexy that you do in the bedroom. We’re talking about what excites you about your partner in your day-to-day lives. Maybe your partner finds it sexy when you help with the housework. Maybe your partner doesn’t find it sexy when you chew with your mouth open. Have a serious discussion about which behaviors are sexy for the both of you and aim to increase those behaviors.
1) Get it on.
Unless you’re in an asexual relationship, sex and other physical contacts like kissing, cuddling and holding hands are necessary components of a romantic relationship. How often you do it is entirely up to you of course. Just make sure that you discuss your ideas about the frequency to avoid any resentment. Although it’s really rare when both of you are in the mood at the same time, it doesn’t mean that you have to dismiss their advances. Just tell yourself that you’ll eventually “get in the zone” after the first few minutes. Bear in mind though that you’re never obliged to say yes if you truly aren’t in the mood. If you’re not feeling it at all, the best thing you can do is postpone or reschedule. Just make sure that you follow up on your promise.